There are no pictures for this day. Migraines and mental health issues are effecting everything.
Serious whiney moments have caved to irrational and extreme rage.
How I See Me Project 2022 11 08
Comfy but won't be wearing this again. The tank top is now too big, amazingly and did not match as well with the skirt. The outline of the skirt string and elastic is disgusting. Shoes are a win though.
How I See Myself Project 2022 11 07
While I do really like these bright red pants, and they are quite comfy, I was constantly concerned with my stomach area. I tried making the blouse asymmetrical and failed with the cute little pin idea. It just drew more attention to the area I wanted to avoid.
2016 September 08
Greeeeat.
He, his RN, and two of his residents sat down and explained to me that due to the severe complications that I had the last time, they were not comfortable doing my surgery.
First, I don't remember my surgery being complicated but that is normal with the type of anesthesia I had supposedly. Dr. Allen had to have a general surgeon on call, had urology and nephrology come and look at my insides, had to have stints put in and then some. Due to all of that, he was going to refer me to Dr. Eisenhower, an oncology gyn surgeon who had more experience. He also thought they might decide to conduct the surgery roboticly. He however would not do it.
Great.
I'm not sure how I feel about all this. First the diabetes with possible Lupus, then having to see an oncologist for the alien babies growing on my ovaries, not to mention the complicated life situation at home. Now it looks like I'll have to miss Autumn Fires so that I can deal with it all.
Grrrr
2016 September 08 Firebird
Much more pricey than I was hoping for/comfortable spending but after trying the food it was completely worth it.
The Kitchen
The Wine-ing Wall?
Her Ceasar Salad
The most amazing meatloaf I have ever had in my entire life,
served with grilled green beans and mashed potatoes.
2016 September 1 Dilemma of the Heart
Last night we had a fight. I told him I was planning on moving out. It did not go well as expected. We ended up arguing over Set. He calling me a liar as well as other things. I know he was hurt and defensive and lashing out. And I really didn't care.
I was numb and disconnected from a lot of the incident. I know I love a part of him. But now, after five years, I know that love isn't enough. You would have thought I learned that with the other one.
Today at work one of the police officers who recognized him as belonging to me let him in to give me a surprise. He has never brought me flowers nor done anything like this in the entire time we have
been together.
He said he wanted to keep trying. I just don't think I can. I know he is scared to be on his own and he has a lot of challenges with the Aspergers. I just can't take care of him, my daughter and myself at the same time. It is too much. He will never accept that SHE will always come first, at his, and my own, expense.
It just hurts so much when I think about it after the arguments are done; when I get to survey the damage left after the storm.
Love and pretty flowers aren't enough.
2016 August 31 Mimi's
We ended up having brunch at Mimi's today. It was much more expensive than we normally would have been comfortable with. The food however was completely worth it. The meatballs were tender and flavorful. The perfect appetizer.
I ordered the omelet with salmon and capers. It was so amazingly good. The food was flavored perfectly. As a side it comes with what they call roasted potatoes. These little bundles were crisp on the outside and so smooth and soft on the inside it was almost like eating a dessert. The only flaw was it was entirely too salty for my liking.
Because we were seated next to the kitchen we hear the commotion as one of the employees lost their temper, threw some things around (full plated dishes, ours if I'm not mistaken) including a few choice verbiage, and stormed out. As a result we received free muffins. One muffin had come with my order. I had chosen blueberry.
So if you want to make me a happy girl, gift me with Mimi's muffins.
Hmmm...that doesn't sound quite right.
2016 August 30 Road Rage
Riding my bumper on the highway is extreme pet peeve of mine. I admit, it is really the only thing that gets to me while driving. I always start to slow down. The longer they are on my bumper, the slower I go. Sometimes I will eventually pull over onto the shoulder or another lane and let them pass. Usually they speed around me and I sometimes send them off with a little sign language salute.
Today however I came close to having a road rage incident. To put things in context, I had just finished a rather emotional therapy session, so my emotions and thoughts were, well, elsewhere. I was on my way to pick up my daughter when this lovely silver Kia flew up on my tail as I was traveling eastbound I-35. I decided to take the Steve Whalen exit and starting to slow down. The driver STILL stayed on my bumper.
I REALLLY don't like anyone on my ass. Period.
Since there was plenty of shoulder room I pulled over and salute the driver as they went by. I went to merge in behind them and they stopped. In the middle of the off ramp. I started to go around them. They turned to cut me off.
Great. Now I 'd done it. I pissed off a crazy person. In this part of town it was likely they could get out and confront me or I could get shot. I didn't think they'd ram into me or risk their vehicle though. It looked rather new and shiny; well taken care of.
Now, my lovely new vehicle, whom we have nicknamed the Battle Bunny, has 4 wheel drive. Off to the right hand was a large open area. So I shifted into the appropriate gear and started into the grass, off roading, to get around this driver. I guess seeing that I wasn't giving in to what I consider bully tactics (and the fact more traffic was coming down the off ramp) they continued on their way to the stop light. I proceeded to follow and managed to get this shot at the light. I tried to get one as I pulled up next to them but the windows were so tinted you couldn't see the driver. They did however see that I was taking pictures.
My first thoughts were to run through the possible scenarios and my possible actions and responses. I had my phone with the preprogrammed one button emergency call, which should be my first response. I had at least two knives readily available within easy reach. And there was also the vehicle itself that could be used to escape or use as a weapon.
Reviewing the incident in my head though, I don't remember once getting scared, or worried, or any anxiety that some would be considered normal.No fear though. No apprehension. A calmness came over me. My mother calls it my work mode (says even my voice changes). One of my friends calls it my Valkyrie side or sometimes he refers to it as my ShieldMother (because I'm not a maiden anymore) coming out. Whatever it is, reconnecting and reintegrating Her into my spirit so that it functions in a healthy way and not the rampaging beserker She was before is slowly coming along. I didn't go for the violent challenging option. For that I am proud of myself.
Now I will have to remember to just let it go and keep my sign language to myself.
2016 August 7 Employee of the month????!!!!!
Employees of the Month: Aug. 2016
Staff: Shannon Hansen
I would like to nominate Shannon Hansen for employee of the month. Shannon is a very hard worker. She goes above and beyond helping her coworkers. I have seen her leave her area to go help in another area. She is very polite and helpful with patients. The other day, I was running like crazy and unable to get a bite to eat due to volume and patient load. I has said something in passing to my partner about how hungry I was. Shannon overheard this and went out to the deli and got me three healthy snacks and put them in a bag with a heart on it at my desk. She didn’t even want me to know who did it. That is how kind she is. She is always smiling and asking if she can help with anything. She will always go into patient rooms to help. Please recognize her for the caring she provided every day to staff and patients alike.
Submitted by: Lisa Jones
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